笑话用英语怎么读:读点笑话学英语，还在等什么~

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【篇一】 A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. his friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - the dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper. 一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱，它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来。他的朋友坚持要来个演示，并给了狗一些钱。狗一溜小跑着去了。但一个小时过去了，仍不见它带报纸回来。 "how much did you give him?" asked the owner. 一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱，它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来。他的朋友坚持要来个演示，并给了狗一些钱。狗一溜小跑着去了。但一个小时过去了，仍不见它带报纸回来。 "five dollars. “五元。” "well, that explains it. when you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie. "这就是了。你给它五元钱时，它就去看电影。 【注释】

(1) claim v.声称

(2) when given money是 when he was given money 的省略

(3) news stall n.售报亭

(4) insist on 坚持

(5) demonstration n.演示

(6) trot off 小步跑开

【篇二】 As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time. 作为一个小学的乐队指挥，为了确保学生投入足够的时间练习，我要求他们上交由他们父母签字的练习单。 I had to laugh, however, when one parent wrote on her child's sheet, "Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed like hours. 可是有一次，一位家长的签字把我逗乐了。练习单上写着：“练习了17分钟，但犹如几个时辰。” 【注释】

(1) band n.乐队

(2) instructor n.指挥

(3) turn in上交；归还

(4) signed by their parents:由他们的父母签名的。这是一个分词短语作定语修饰sheets.

(5) so I can be sure they are putting in enough time:这样我才能确定他们投入了足够的时间。这是so that 引导的目的状语从句，其中that省略。

【篇三】 To prevent our dog, Lacy, from pestering visitors to our house, my mother often massaged her as she lounged beneath the kitchen table, her favorite resting spot. One day a contractor came over to talk about a home-improvement project. 为避免我们的狗，莱希，纠缠来访的客人，我母亲常在爱犬喜欢呆的地方，即餐桌下面，摩昵它。一天，一个建筑商来谈居室装潢工程。 As he and my mother sat across the table discussing the renovations, my mother slipped off her shoes and mindlessly soothed Lacy with her feet. 在这人和我母亲坐在餐桌边谈居室的修茸时，我母亲滑脱了她的鞋子，开始不经意地用脚摩蹭起莱希来。

My mother had been talking for about a half-hour when to her great embarrassment she heard Lacy bark outside the front door. 谈话进行了半个小时的时候，我母亲突然感到很不好意思起来，因为这时她听到了莱希在前门外的犬吠声。 【注释】

(1) prevent （from）v.避免；阻止

(2) pester v.使苦恼；困扰

(3) massage v.按摩；揉捏

(4) lounge v.懒洋洋地坐着或站着

(5) contractor n.承包商

(6) improvement n.改进；改善

(7) renovation n.修复；修理

(8) slip off滑脱；掉

(9) mindlessly adv.不注意地

读点笑话学英语，还在等什么~.doc

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