轻松的事儿 ——杰克.沃尔森(瑞典) 告诉我一些轻松的事儿,她说,一些我会忘的东西。 于是我告诉她企鹅是很古老的物种,比恐龙还古老。 我告诉她鲫鱼没有寿命年限,所以理论上说它们可以一直活下去。 我告诉她一个八十年代的研究认为蓝眼睛的人容易让人产生信任感,他们的人际关系也维持得更久;而褐色眼睛的人让人心生尊敬和爱慕也让人感觉疏远。 我没有告诉她我遇到的每个爱蒙事的家伙都有双蓝眼睛;我也没告诉她我的那些有着褐色眼睛的朋友总被指责对他们的伴侣不够坦诚。 我告诉她我的眼睛是绿色的,它们有时看起来像是淡褐色;但我没告诉她其实我眼睛的颜色介于这二者之间。 我告诉她一个来自佐治亚州亚特兰大市的小伙子获得了一笔经费,用来研究人在水中和在麦片粥中游泳的差异。 我告诉她当每个人都知道获得一笔科研经费有多么容易的时候,贫困将不再是困扰我们的问题。 我问她是否听说过“清新梦”。 她摇摇头。 于是我告诉她“清醒梦”是指一个人能对自己梦到什么进行控制。在白天反复问自己是醒着还是在做梦,训练自己认可怪诞的事情或梦的征兆,通过这些手段你就可以学会做“清醒梦”。 听起来挺无聊的,她说,就像提前知道每部电影怎样开始和收场。 跟我说点其他的,她说。 于是我告诉她四百年前人们看不到今天这样的日落。造就今天这般壮观的日落和彩虹的主要原因是污染。我告诉她这对年轻人是不幸中的幸事。 我告诉她科学家们已经研制出了通过遥控来胳肢人的机器人,但人永远也没办法胳肢自己。 我告诉她狮子是色盲。一只橘黄色的斑马,但只要它身上有波浪般的条纹,就可以借助高高的野草隐蔽自己。 我告诉她喜剧是社会的润滑剂;一部情景喜剧或者一个喜剧演员可以定义一种文化并使一代人彼此认同。如果这还不够轻松,我又告诉她大多数的电视节目是通过卫星播放的;我们每天通过太空传播的娱乐节目远远多于所有合法的与外星物种交流的尝试,等到外星物种真的发现我们的时候,沟通的方式将不是数字信息,而是俏皮话。 我告诉她基督教科学派信徒相信“恶灵”是被飞船带到地球上来的,在他们看来,这种飞船和道格拉斯DC8s 喷气客机没什么两样。 我告诉她最近有一项调查显示五十年代的人比我们多了60%的幸福。 我告诉她自五十年代以来十五个国家已经摆脱了贫困,医药和科技完成了一次次飞跃,并且糖果的味道比以前更好了。(我告诉她最后这一点我不敢保证,但只要想到巧克力制作工艺的发展,我就越发确信了) 我告诉他五十年代离二战结束只不过五年。 我告诉她这个调查没有列出受访者的名字,也没有注明他们住在哪里。 我告诉她音乐是一种能量,它永远在无生命体的原子之间振动。泥巴和砂砾承载着莫扎特和鲍勃.迪伦乐曲中的音符。把它们加热,它们会为你唱出来,那些几百年之前的音符。 我告诉她在伦敦苏富比艺术馆的一个穹顶上有一块岩石,它记载着第一首被演奏过的曲子。 我告诉她她睡着了,没在听。她的眼睛闭着,不置一言。 Something Light Jack Wallsten Tell me something light, she says,something I’ll forget. So I tell her penguins are so old they have outlived the dinosaurs. I tell her carp has no natural life span and could technically live forever. I tell her a research project from the 1980s said people with blue eyes generate trust more easily and generally last longer in relationships, while people with brown eyes are more likely to be viewed as distant objects of idolism and affection. I don’t tell her that every con artist I’ve ever met had blue eyes or that my brown-eyed friends are constantly accused of hiding something from their partners. I tell her my eyes are green, and sometimes hazel, but I don’t tell her that means I’m somewhere in between. I tell her a boy from Atlanta, Georgia, got a research grant to study the difference between swimming in water and swimming in oat meal. I tell her the day everyone realized how easy it is to get research grants poverty will no longer been an issue. I ask her if she’s ever heard of lucid dreaming? She shakes her head no. So I tell her lucid dreaming is the skill to control what happens in your dreams. You can learn this by asking yourself throughout the day if you are awake or dreaming and by training yourself to recognize odd occurrences, or dream signs. Sounds boring, she says, like knowing how every movie will begin and end. Tell me something else, she says. So I tell her the sunsets we have today they didn’t have 400 years ago. Pollution is the main reason we have sunsets and rainbows as magnificent as they are today. I tell her that’s a silver lining for ya. I tell her it’s impossible to tickle yourself, although scientists have developed a robot tickler which tickles by remote control. I tell her lions are colorblind. A zebra could be bright orange and still be camouflaged in the tall grass, as long as it has its wavy lines. I tell her comedy is social lubricant and one sitcom, or one comedian can unify a generation and define a culture. If this isn’t light enough, I tell her, most television is 本文来源:https://www.wddqw.com/doc/3f33a5ff3286bceb19e8b8f67c1cfad6185fe94e.html