句子的简练:累赘是写作常见的弊病之一。写作时应力求言简意赅,短小精悍。也就是说,在能说“走,天竺!”的时候千万不要说“你挑着担我骑着马迎来日出送走晚霞地去西天也就是天竺现在叫印度的地方如来佛祖那里取经到东土大唐来。”(咦?为什么大家都在吐?)众人:
那个……总之,能简洁就简洁便是了。下面来看几句例句。
繁琐 My little bother always disappears from view when it is time for dinner.
简洁 My little bother always disappears when it is time for dinner.
繁琐 The point I am trying to make is that practice makes perfect.
简洁 I believe that practice makes perfect.
繁琐 I am writing to call your attention to the fact that…
简洁 I am writing to remind you that…
练习:
下列句子中都很繁琐,请修改成简洁句。
1)There are several things which are interesting here.
2)It is encouraging and inspiring to note that sales which are reported right now have increased this month.
3)Another factor that adds to the persuasive power of this speech is the vivid example is gives.
参考答案:
1)There are several things which are interesting here.
Several things are interesting here.
2)It is encouraging and inspiring to note that sales which are reported right now have increased this month.
Sales have increased this month; the figures are encouraging.(特别说明一下,这句句子是商务英语写作的范畴,一般不用形式主语,不用从句,所以这里不要用it is + aj.句型。)
3)Another factor that adds to the persuasive power of this speech is the vivid example is gives.
The vivid example also makes the speech mor persuasive.
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