First thing in the morning, I check Twitter, only to have it list off for me all the ways I’ve already fallen behind. A colleague has released a new e-book. Two of my design heroes are announcing a collaborative project. One of my old college buddies has posted a video trailer for an upcoming online program, and she looks phenomenal, polished, charismatic (I’m still in bed, bleary-eyed, and definitely not at my most telegenic.)
每天早晨,我的第一件事就是刷推特,因为它会显示出来在哪些事情上我已经落后了。比如:我的同事已经发布了一本新电子书,我崇拜的两个设计英雄声明一起合作项目,我的一个大学朋友在网上发布了一段即将上映的节目的视频预告片,她看起来美貌惊人、闪闪发亮、充满魅力(而我还窝在床上,睡眼惺忪,肯定是不能上镜的。)
Am I really falling behind? Is anybody actually keeping score? Did any of these people post any of the updates with the intent of making me feel bad? Of course not. But if I’m not careful, it’s terribly easy to view my social media streams as a constant reminder of all the stuff I’m not doing and dreams I’m not fulfilling.
那么,我确实落后了吗?其他人一直都在取得成绩吗?这些人发布的任何状态更新都是为了刺激我?当然不是。但是如果我不是很细心的话,那么很容易觉得我的社交媒体流一直在提醒我没有做的事情和没有实现的梦想。
This isn’t a social media problem. It’s a comparison problem. There isn’t a single thing about Twitter – or any of the other social media platforms I use – that’s designed to make me ask how I’m measuring up. That’s all me – an automatic, internal mechanism. It’s part ego (“But what does this say about me?”), part creative drive (“What more am I capable of?”), and part deep soul yearning (“How can I make an impact, leave a legacy, and matter?”).
这其实不是社交媒体的问题,这是一个攀比的问题。推特以及我使用的其他社交媒体平台本身没有任何问题,它们的设计初衷本就不是让我用来进行自我估量的。这都是我的问题——自动的内部机制。一部分出于自我因素(“但这说到了我什么?”),一部分出于创新驱动(“我还可以做到更多吗?”),还有一部分出于内心深处的呐喊(“我如何才能产生影响、留下遗产并发挥作用?”)。
And I know it’s not just me. I’ve spent the past year collaborating with leadership coach Tanya Geisler on researching how comparison works, what it costs us, and what it can teach us – and we’ve discovered that it runs rampant among just about every creative, growth-oriented person we know. In our comparison-soaked cultu
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