「中国英文」（Chinese English）Chinglish “地道中文”的搞笑英语翻译 1.we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿 2.You give me stop! 你给我站住 3Good good study,day day up!好好学习天天向上4.Icall Liold bigtoyear25我叫李老大今年25 6.you have two down son你有两下子 7.You ask me,I ask who？你问我，我去问谁？ 8.People mountain and people sea.人山人海 9.seven up eight down 七上八下 10.no three no four不三不四 11. Moon under old man 月下老人 12.Open the door see mountain开门见山 13. pen see you 鄙视你 14.Five flowers eight doors五花八门 15.I’ll give you some color to see see(我要给你点颜色看看) 1.王 八 蛋：wang eight eggs 2.白痴：White eat! 3.吃白 食：eat white food 4.红颜知己：red face know me 5.老 表：old watch 6.表妹：watch sister 7.别唬我：don’t tiger me 8.狗 娘 养 的：dog mother born 9.作早操：do early fuck 10.不三不四：no three no four 11.马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger 12. 你给我站住：you give me stop 13.你他妈的：you he mother’s 14.你问我我去问谁：you ask me,me ask who 15.猪头三去死吧：pig head 3,go dead! 16.朝三暮四：morning three night four 17.怎么是你：how are you? 18. how old are you? 怎么老是你 19.要钱不给，要命有一条：want money no, want life one 20.三人行，必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher 1.各位知不知道“让广州充满爱”的官方翻译？—Let’s make love everywhere in our Guangzhou！！ 2.你也许已走出我的视线,但从未走出我的思念You may be out of my sight,but never out of my mind 3怀才像怀孕时间长才能看到Having knowledge likes having pregnantit takes times to beawareness 4.妈妈说人最好不要错过两样东西，最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人. Mom said you’d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the person who loves you deeply. 5.萝卜青菜，各有所爱。[误] Some prefer radish but others prefer cabbage.[正] Tastes differ。No dish suits all tastes 或You can never make everyone happy 6.他一向嘴硬，从不认错。[误] He has always got a hard mouth and never admit a fault.[正] He never says uncle.注：当一方想制服另一方时就用命令说：“Say uncle!” “服输”，而not say uncle 就是“嘴硬” 7.同学们都很讨厌他，因为他经常拍老师的马屁。[误] The students all dislike him because he often pats the teacher's ass.[正] The students all dislike him because he often licks the teacher's boots.注：以前在欧洲，臣民见到国王与王后往往要亲吻他们的靴子。后来，人们将lick the boots 引申汉语的“拍马屁”。在美国英语中，“拍马屁”还有另一种说法polish the apple，学生用擦亮的苹果来讨好老师。 8.你听说了吗？迈克把他的女朋友给甩了。[误] Have you ever heard that Mike broke up with his girlfriend?[正] Have you ever heard that Mike dumped his girlfriend?注：break up with sb. 虽然表示“与某人分手了”，并没说明是谁先提出来的。而dump 指“倾倒垃圾”，这里则表示像倒垃圾一样地甩掉。 9.人都是这山望着那山高，对自己的现状没有满意的时候。[误] Almost all people think that the other mountain is higher than the one he's standing on. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.[正] Almost all people think that the grass is greener on the other hill. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.注：“这山望着那山高”是指人不满足于现状的心理，它在英语中已经有了现成的说法，即the grass is greener on the other hill(他山的草更绿)，因此我们借用即可， 1 10. “big river goes to the east，all the star follows beidou”，这句英文大意就是：大河向东流，天上的星星参北斗。这首“洋气十足”的《好汉歌》的英文版挟着天雷滚滚而来. 11. 人山人海：有人直译为：People mountain people sea. 这就是「中国英文」，老外很难理解。他们指「人多」时，通常只说：「There is a large crowd of people.」 12. 天下无不散的宴席：有人直译为：There are no feasts in the world which do not break up at last. All good things come to an end. (意思是：所有好的事情，总有结束的一天。) China：拆哪儿？查哪儿？圈哪儿？切哪儿？亲哪儿？去哪儿？吃哪儿？钱儿呢？ English:应给利息，阴沟里洗，硬改历史， 妈妈，我不想学英语了，因为老师不靠谱，还老教我们骂人：他说今天是Today，昨天也是yestoday; 他一会儿说Yes,一会儿说Nice, 一会儿说Bus,一会儿说Goose, 最后还说都guess！） 中式英语按照拼音的顺序排了出来，如下表。 1.What the fuck is going on?（到底他妈的怎么回事?） 2.You son of bitch! （你个狗娘养的！） 3."同学是某偏远地区的，英语发音一直不标准，老师英文也是发不准，所以学生更是一口地道的土腔英语。话说同学的妹妹刚上初一，学英语的积极性狂高，每天早晨天不亮就开始朗读单词，这天像往常一样，继续拼命的读，他爹就蹲在窗户底下抽烟袋。小妹妹念“hands(音:汉子),hands”，“two hands(偷汉子)。他爹听完就止不住的皱眉，一大早就听见闺女要偷汉子，心想怪不得听说外国人开放，书上都这么写。小妹妹继续读“hands，hands，two hands(偷汉子)” I have two hands.。 汉子,偷汉子,俺还偷汉子 4.话说一个国内知名企业，一天来了一个重要的外宾，下面是前台的对话。 前台小姐：“hello.”你好。美国人：“hi.”你好。 前台小姐：“you have what thing？”你有什么事情？ 美国人：“can you speak English？”你能和我说英语吗？ 前台小姐：“if i not speak English，i am speaking what？”如果我不是在说英语，那我在说什么呢？美国人：“can anybody else speak English？”这里有别的人能说英语吗？ 前台小姐：“you yourself look，all people are playing ，no people have time，you can wait，you wait， you not wait，you go！”.你自己看看，所有的人都在忙着，没有人有时间，你能等你就等，你不能等你说走！ 美国人：“good heavens. anybody here can speak English？”我的天啦，这里没有人能讲英语吗？ 前台小姐：“shout what shout，quiet a little，you have what thing?”嚷什么嚷，安静一点，你还有什么事情？美国人：“i want to speak to your head.”我要找你们的头儿。 前台小姐：“head not zai . you tomorrow come！”头不在，你明天来！ 5..小明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet?老师说：Goa head. 小明就坐了下来。过了一会儿，小明又跟老师说：May I go to the toilet?老师说：Goa head. 小明又坐了下来。他旁边的同学于是忍不住问：你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗？怎么不去？ 小明说：你没听老师说「去你个头」啊！ 6.某女领导会见外宾，要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻，不许走样。外宾一见到女士，立刻按照西方的习惯拍马屁道："Miss，you are very beautiful."翻译照翻，领导心花怒放，嘴上还要谦虚一下：“哪里，哪里”。翻译不敢怠慢，把她的话翻成英文："Where? Where?"外宾一愣，干脆马屁拍到底："Every where, every where。"翻译：“你到处都很漂亮。”领导更高兴了，但总是要客气一下：“不见得，不见得”。 翻译赶紧翻成英文："You are not all owed to see , you are not all owed to see." 7.某男，亦粗通英文，至使馆，有表要填，有一栏是：Sex，该男久思，毅然下笔：“Once a week”。 2 本文来源：https://www.wddqw.com/doc/1d45fa375fbfc77da369b19e.html